Don't Die with Your Music Still in You: A Daughter's Response to Her Father's Wisdom

Don't Die with Your Music Still in You: A Daughter's Response to Her Father's Wisdom

In 2001, Dr. Wayne Dyer wrote a book called 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace, based on the most important principles he wanted his children to live by. Serena Dyer, one of those children, has contemplated these ideas throughout her life. “Don’t die with your music still in you” has been the most important principle for Serena: to her, it means that you don’t allow yo...

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Title:Don't Die with Your Music Still in You: A Daughter's Response to Her Father's Wisdom
Author:Serena J. Dyer
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Edition Language:English

Don't Die with Your Music Still in You: A Daughter's Response to Her Father's Wisdom Reviews

  • Sojourner

    Several years ago, Dr. Wayne Dyer wrote a book 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace which contained ten instructive, path-breaking and illuminating secrets:

    The First Secret: Have a mind that is open to everything and attached to nothing

    The Second Secret: Don’t die with your music still in you

    The Third Secret: You can’t give away what you don’t have

    The Fourth Secret: Embrace silence

    The Fifth Secret: Give up your personal history

    The Sixth Secret: You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that

    Several years ago, Dr. Wayne Dyer wrote a book 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace which contained ten instructive, path-breaking and illuminating secrets:

    The First Secret: Have a mind that is open to everything and attached to nothing

    The Second Secret: Don’t die with your music still in you

    The Third Secret: You can’t give away what you don’t have

    The Fourth Secret: Embrace silence

    The Fifth Secret: Give up your personal history

    The Sixth Secret: You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it

    The Seventh Secret: There are no justified resentments

    The Eighth Secret: Treat yourself as if you already are what you’d like to be

    The Ninth Secret: Treasure your divinity

    The Tenth Secret: Wisdom is avoiding all thoughts that weaken you

    Serena J. Dyer, who is the sixth of Wayne’s eight children, was deeply influenced by the Second of the ten secrets that her father laid down in the book. It is the profound impact of that Second Secret that birthed this book Don’t Die with Your Music Still in You: My Experience Growing Up with Spiritual Parents which is co-written with her father, Dr. Wayne W. Dyer.

    What needs to be pointed out is that though the book is not a rehash of Dyer’s earlier book, it basically follows the same 10-pattern of 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace as far as chapter title and division is concerned. Those who read her father’s book will be immediately struck by the familiarity, with chapter-wise arrangement being the only difference. However, what is pertinent to note is that this book is her response to growing up with spiritual parents as teachers and what she learned from them. Deeply touching at times with personal stories which shed much light on the Dyer family, the book is insightful, perceptive and inspiring.

  • Pat Collingwood-Ruppel

    Just finished this book by Serena Dyer, Dr. Wayne Dyer's daughter. Great read with a different perspective on living a spiritual life coming from a young person's take. I loved it.

  • Cloris Kylie

    Ten Secrets for Success and Inner Peace by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer is one of my top favorite books; concise, yet full of wisdom. That’s why I was so excited when I heard that Serena Dyer, Dr. Dyer’s daughter and one of my radio show guests, had written a book based on the ten secrets in Dr. Dyer’s book.

    Why read a book about a book? Because every author offers a unique perspective that enriches the original message. This is what Dr. Dyer did when he wrote his interpretation of the Tao Te Ching: Change

    Ten Secrets for Success and Inner Peace by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer is one of my top favorite books; concise, yet full of wisdom. That’s why I was so excited when I heard that Serena Dyer, Dr. Dyer’s daughter and one of my radio show guests, had written a book based on the ten secrets in Dr. Dyer’s book.

    Why read a book about a book? Because every author offers a unique perspective that enriches the original message. This is what Dr. Dyer did when he wrote his interpretation of the Tao Te Ching: Change Your Thoughts – Change Your Life: Living the Wisdom of the Tao. In Serena’s case, she offers the perspective of a daughter who was raised following the principles in Ten Secrets for Success and Inner Peace.

    Don’t Die With Your Music Still In You: My Experience Growing Up with Spiritual Parents is a book I couldn’t put down because of three main reasons:

    First, the book’s structure allows Serena to respond to the teachings her father laid out in his book, but Dr. Dyer also adds his reaction at the end of each chapter. The two perspectives helped me internalize the core messages in the book.

    Second, the many stories included in Don’t Die With Your Music Still In You made Serena’s reflections much more powerful. Bestselling author Cheryl Richardson taught me that the best way to teach something is by telling a story, and Serena proved she is a master storyteller.

    Third, the writing exudes authenticity. It can be difficult to admit that we have flaws and fall prey to the ego from time to time, especially when we have been raised by spiritual parents such as Marcelene and Wayne Dyer. However, Serena is brave to admit that she has made mistakes in the past and sometimes moves away from the state of pure love she wishes to reach.

    I believe we’re all a work in progress, and what matters is to become aware of those times when we remove ourselves from who we really are (love and joy) and not only learn from the experience, but quickly shift direction.

    The ten chapters in the book follow the structure of Ten Secrets for Success and Inner Peace:

    Have a mind that is open to everything and attached to nothing. Serena says that in her home, “nothing was taboo (…) We talked about ghosts, time travel, outer space, and other dimensions.”

    Become inspired to explore different ideas, different places, and listen to people from different backgrounds than yours. You’ll enrich your life experience and have fun in the process.

    You can’t give away what you don’t have. We can’t react with anger, criticism or hatred if love takes up most of the space in our heart, and conversely, we can’t give love away if we’re filled with negative emotions.

    In Serena’s family, “gossip and negative talk weren’t encouraged.” You can choose not only to raise your children this way, but to become aware of what you give away and decide whether it matches the kind of person you want to be.

    Embrace silence. Serena’s mother experienced a miraculously pain-free delivery when she had her first child, in large part because of her dedication to silent meditation.

    Try spending more time in silence, alone. Silence will become a welcome oasis in your life rather than something awkward or scary.

    Give up your personal history. “If we’re still living in our past experiences, we aren’t getting the lessons they are meant to teach us,” Serena writes.

    Even though letting go of the past can be difficult to do, especially when we’ve been hurt deeply, it’s our only way to freedom.

    Decide to release your past hurts starting today.

    You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it. A couple of days ago, I was trying to figure out how to share my message with more people on social media, but couldn’t find an answer.

    I eventually realized I needed to stop focusing on what I might have been doing wrong. I stepped away from the problem, and when I saw it with different eyes, I found the solution.

    As Serena writes, “The problem is not really the problem, as confusing as that sounds, the problem is the way we think about the problem.”

    Dare to break your old patterns of thinking to overcome challenges.

    There are no justified resentments. “Blame” was a word that the Dyer children were never allowed to use. The reason is simple: Taking responsibility for whatever shows up in our life is the only way to assume control for what happens next.

    Refuse to wait for circumstances to change or for someone to behave differently to reach the state of joy you know you deserve.

    Treat yourself as if you already are what you’d like to be. This is one of the most powerful tenets that guides me. How does this principle work? It’s a matter of energy alignment.

    If you train your subconscious mind to see itself as already possessing what you want, you will think and behave in ways that will allow you to get what you want.

    As Dr. Dyer always says and Serena reinstates, we don’t get what we want, we get what we are.

    Who do you want to become? Align your thoughts and actions with your desires.

    Treasure your divinity. This book reminds us that a spark of God is inside each one of us, and if we are constantly aware of this, we’ll tend to think and act in ways that reflect the divine love within us.

    Serena introduces the analogy of God as the ocean, and each one of us as a cup of water from that ocean.

    Become one with the ocean of God to treasure and experience your magnificence in its full splendor.

    Wisdom is avoiding all thoughts that weaken you. This chapter talks about the importance of avoiding thoughts that produce negative emotions, and refers to the muscle testing studies done by Dr. David Hawkins.

    Your body will tell you whether you’re aligned with a positive or negative thought. Surge of energy? Continue focusing on the thought. Tightness in the stomach? Time to divert your attention to something different.

    I left the most significant message for last:

    Don’t die with your music still in you. This book reminded me to follow my calling regardless of what those around me say or do.

    Do what inspires you! As Serena writes, “making the choice not to die with our music inside of us can be gut-wrenchingly hard, but it’s so worth it.”

    Want to learn strategies to energize your life so you can follow your calling? I invite you to watch this free video training series to help you reach your highest potential.

    For more on how to create an extraordinary life, visit

    . Access a free video training series to help you reach your highest potential here:

    FTC Disclosure: I received this book for free from Hay House Publishing for this review. The opinion in this review is unbiased and reflects my honest judgment of the product.

  • Karin

    Excellent book. Serena gives examples of how her parents' principles have helped her in her own life. Wayne does a lot of telling of his ideas, but not too much showing how they worked in his own life. Serena also writes well.

  • Jennifer England

    Everyone should read this. Beautifully written. Serena you are an inspiration just like your Dad! I am so glad you decided to write this book. Thank you.

  • Neila

    This Boole moved me to tears several times reminding me where my focus needs to be and how we all get caught up in the physical world. It inspires me to be a inspired mom to my three beautiful kids.

  • Sharon Powers

    Book Review by: Sharon Powers. [This book is an Advance Reader Copy (ARC) for review from NetGalley.]

    Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. [Inigo advances on Rugen...] Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. [Inigio advances and parries Rugen's attack...] Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. [Count Rugen:] Stop saying that! [Rugen attacks, but Inigio parries Rugen and wounds him...] HELLO! MY NAME

    Book Review by: Sharon Powers. [This book is an Advance Reader Copy (ARC) for review from NetGalley.]

    Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. [Inigo advances on Rugen...] Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. [Inigio advances and parries Rugen's attack...] Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. [Count Rugen:] Stop saying that! [Rugen attacks, but Inigio parries Rugen and wounds him...] HELLO! MY NAME IS INIGO MONTOYA! YOU KILLED MY FATHER! PREPARE TO DIE! [Inigo corners Rugen and disarms him...Inigo says:] Offer me money. [Rugen:] Yes! [Inigio:] Power, too, promise me that. [Rugen:] All that I have and more. Please... [Inigio:] Offer me anything I ask for. [Rugen:] Anything you want...

    In this scene from the movie, The Princess Bride, Inigio Montoya next says, "I want my father back, you son of a bitch!" and then he kills Rugen. But, in a real life imitation of that movie scene, without the blood, and definitely, funnier, my husband, son, and I, traveling on a photo trip to Yosemite, CA, stopped at a roadside Starbucks for drinks. My son was only asking for a frappaccino--not money, and not power (like Inigio did, just above) and he definitely didn't tell anyone they would die if they didn't get his drink correct!

    My darling son, John, whose wacky sense of humor

    prompted him to buy a "meme" tee shirt with the

    name of Inigo Montoya on it as a spoof on the

    The Princess Bride.

    The young woman who took the coffee order never asked my son what his name was, but only wrote down on the cup, "Inigo Montoya," after quickly glancing at the "name tag" on his shirt. (The name tag is one of those silk-screened, printed, onto a "Think Geek" t-shirt (link). It says, "Hello. My name is: Inigio Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die."). When my son got his drink, he brought it back to show me and I laughed so hard everyone in Starbucks gawked at me--I, of course, took the picture and posted it to Facebook.

    What is a meme, and how does it relate to this blog post? Serena J. Dyer, in one part of her book, Don't Die with Your Music Still in You, talks about how sometimes we might do things without thinking about why we are doing it. In one definition of the word, "meme," memes are really just a way of imitating and passing on ideas...or funny thoughts, just like the story of my son and his Inigo Montoya shirt. The internet is rife with "memes," and one website to which both my son and I subscribe is, "9gag.com"--it is nothing but humorous memes.

    One societal meme is that exercise is "hard." [3]

    Serena explains that the difficulty comes when we accept certain culturally conditioned behaviors, like, "Healthy eating is difficult," or "life is hard," that might lead us to a type of behavior we actually don't want...like not even trying to choose healthier food. In a chapter about changing your thinking, Serena tells a charming story about herself, a friend, and how her eyes were opened up to just how she had been culturally conditioned to accept certain attitudes about getting fit. Serena tells how her father, Wayne Dyer, taught her that recognizing memes, understanding them, and changing the use of cultural memes is part of changing the way she thought...she, in turn, teaches us that we can change the way we look at things, too. And...to that end, let's take a look at the book.

    THE BOOK:

    Serena informs us that her book basically follows her father's book, 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace, and that it is her response to, or her perspective on, learning those "10 Secrets," at her parents knees. Serena gives us, as readers of her book, the unique and intimate perspective on those "10 Secrets."

    Serena places the "10 Secrets," in chapters full of stories and anecdotes, at once personal and deeply intimate. At the end of each chapter, Wayne Dyer, her Dad, responds to what Serena has told us, providing his own perspective on raising Serena (and his other children).

    Serena titled the book, Don't Die with Your Music Still in You: A Daughter's Response to Her Father's Wisdom; it is also the title of the first chapter in her book. She relates that "not dying with your music still in you," is all about how you lead your life, not about what you "do" with your life. She explains that while she was once "irked," about the concept of life being a "journey," now she feels good that she is able to live her life and be on her journey without ever having to change who or what she is for anyone else. In this book, Serena takes us with her on her journey as she grows up in the Dyer household, providing us with insights and amusing stories about her life with a famous father she calls, "Dad."

    Why should we care about this book? Especially to people who have already read, 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace, why would anyone want to read a book, ostensibly, based upon a book they have already read? Even Serena clearly states that she has basically followed her father's book in organizing her own story about life with her famous father.

    We should care, first, because even if the basic information from the book, 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace, is present, it is most definitely, NOT the same book. What we get, here, is a very personal perspective on the way a young woman was raised by parents deeply involved in writing and public speaking--one involving and practicing motivation and self-help.

    Serena tells us that she likes to tell stories, and that comes through, here. She tells us stories, ones in which she shares with us deeply embarrassing moments of self-revelation and times of her deepest joys, she shares with us stories of friendships made, stories about daily life in the Dyer household, and stories about moments of weakness and triumph. Serena fashions each of her stories so as to illustrate how she learned, first hand, each of her father's 10 Secrets...and, what she is still working on.

    Second, neither is Dr. Wayne Dyer's contribution to the book a rehash of his 10 Secrets book. In each chapter, after Serena has presented her take on the chapter's topic, he responds to Serena's exposition. Wayne responds as a parent would, rather than the world famous public speaker and author. We get to see a deep love for family in the intimate moments that make up the book. We get to see Wayne Dyer as Serena sees him, as Dad.

    Third, the material presented clearly shows this family living an authentic life. For example, we already know about Wayne Dyer from his books and his extensive public speaking that he wanted to live a life of self-reliance. So, we know that it is important to him that he teaches his children this important concept. Another indicator of living an authentic life is seen in how Dr. Dyer expresses is his profound respect for his children in encouraging them each to live in a way that they will not come to the end of their life with their music still in them. Moreover, in the pages of the book, we get to observe Wayne Dyer teach his children about the danger of following someone else's mental picture (also, societal memes) of who they should be and what they should do with their lives.

    So why should we care about this book? Why should we read it? I think it is important that we can see Serena and Wayne (and the family) living an authentic life, not one in which it is do as I say, not as I do. We get to see the personal side of the family members, not just the public faces. This is important because we see that as hard as they try to put into practice the 10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace, they still must struggle from time to time with problems--they are human--like us...

    ...and yet, their courage to reveal themselves to the world--to let others see not only what they do well, but weaknesses and failures--is a hallmark of living an authentic life. We also know that it is important because we come to understand that in their struggle, there is something with which we can identify. They "get" us. They "understand" us. And here is where it gets really important: one of the critical things we learn from reading this book is that in spite of the struggle, it is possible to take the tools given to us and make our own lives better. We can take our failures, weaknesses, and losses and parley them into something that will give us a rewarding life. A way to journey towards a life where we will not die with our music still in us.

    WHAT DIDN'T WORK, FOR ME:

    I liked the overall structure of the book; in fact it reminded me very much of the way Deepak Chopra and his brother Sanjiv Chopra co-authored their book, Brotherhood: Dharma, Destiny, and The American Dream. In spite of liking the structure, I thought the opening pages of the Dyer book were a bit draggy. I think the opening pages (the Introduction) should have taken advantage of Serena's wonderful story-telling abilities.

    For example, she could have started out with someone, Oprah, for example, asking Serena about what it was like growing up with Wayne Dyer for her father. She could have related a short story about gossiping with her girlfriends (about someone) and how embarrassed she was when caught, and wanting to crawl under the carpet and hide; then, she could have related that it was one of the important lessons she learned in life and how proud she is to have the father she has. This little story would come at the beginning of the Introduction and add to its interest, immensely. Really, any appropriate mini-story would have worked.

    One more minor criticism. I would have loved to hear how Serena got into working with the groups against human trafficking of children. Perhaps she could have tied it into, putting to use, one of the tools she learned from her mom and dad--for example, asking, "How may I serve?" Even a few short paragraphs or a couple of pages would have been nice. I'd like to ask her if she had something like that on her "Vision Board."

    MY RECOMMENDATIONS AND RATING FOR THIS BOOK:

    Recommendations: Most of the book I would consider as a G rated book, suitable for any age person capable of reading. However, in a couple of places the authors deal with serious issues of rape and violent physical assault that might not be appropriate for very young or very sensitive readers.

    For these readers only, I would suggest broaching these topics with an appropriate health professional. To all other readers, especially young adults, I would deem this book as not only appropriate, but essential to personal growth.

    Rating: 4.25 Stars out of 5 Stars.

    Rating: My rating of this book was very easy. The rating I give is 4.25 stars out of 5. It is a wonderful, informative, well-written (with the noted exceptions), and entertaining book--deserving of a good rating. I found it to be inspiring and uplifting in the very best sense of those words. I congratulate Serena Dyer on the great job she has done with her first foray into book writing.

    I, personally, would love to see another book from Serena, perhaps on the work you do with human trafficking of children.

    Thank you all for joining me this week for the review of the memoir/self-help book by Serena J. Dyer and Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, Don't Die With Your Music Still in You: A Daughter's Response to Her Father's Wisdom. This book will be released June 16, 2014--be sure to pre-order your copy now from your local book purveyor.

    If you would like to see this book review with all the graphics you can do so on my blog site at

  • Heather Fineisen

    I am a believer, a fan, a reader of Wayne Dyer and thank my mother for introducing him to me. I wish I would have had this book in my teens and twenties as Serena Dyer breaks down her dad's teachings in a relatable way. I am glad to have read this as a parent because Dad Dyer throws his two cents in at the end of each chapter and there are some teachable moments for both parent and offspring. We are all human and we all make mistakes. What an opportunity to learn from someone else's! Definitely

    I am a believer, a fan, a reader of Wayne Dyer and thank my mother for introducing him to me. I wish I would have had this book in my teens and twenties as Serena Dyer breaks down her dad's teachings in a relatable way. I am glad to have read this as a parent because Dad Dyer throws his two cents in at the end of each chapter and there are some teachable moments for both parent and offspring. We are all human and we all make mistakes. What an opportunity to learn from someone else's! Definitely worth having to share with your family and to gain some valuable insight into your own being. With gems like, You can't give love if you don't love yourself, you can't go wrong.

    Provided by publisher

  • Unigami

    I've always wondered if Wayne Dyer was "the real deal". I've been a big fan for many years, so I got pretty excited last year when I heard that a memoir was coming out from one of his children. Could it be a scandalous exposé??? Probably not...my hopes for something juicy were dashed when I learned that it was going to be a collaboration between Wayne and his daughter Serena. I put the book on my back-burner "to read" list.

    Sadly, my interest in this book was renewed after Wayne passed away unexp

    I've always wondered if Wayne Dyer was "the real deal". I've been a big fan for many years, so I got pretty excited last year when I heard that a memoir was coming out from one of his children. Could it be a scandalous exposé??? Probably not...my hopes for something juicy were dashed when I learned that it was going to be a collaboration between Wayne and his daughter Serena. I put the book on my back-burner "to read" list.

    Sadly, my interest in this book was renewed after Wayne passed away unexpectedly two weeks ago and I happened to see Serena's eulogy posted on his Facebook page. It was so heart-felt, honest and touching that it compelled me to give this book a try.

    I ended up enjoying it quite a bit.

    The book is mostly written by Serena, and each chapter focuses on one of Wayne Dyer's "10 Secrets for Success and Inner Peace" which was the subject of his 2001 book of the same title. Wayne has said that these 10 Secrets represent his philosophy toward life, the "essential truths", and that he wrote the book primarily as an instruction manual for his children. Serena devotes a chapter to each secret by giving personal anecdotes that relate to it and the wisdom that she has learned. The chapter concludes with a few words from Wayne.

    Was Wayne the "real deal"? Well, judging by Serena's account, he was. He truly believed in these truths and strove to practice them fully in his own life and teach them to his children. Serena's anecdotes provide plenty of evidence for that. They also a reveal a side of Wayne Dyer that might surprise many of his fans...a man who wasn't afraid to tell off-color jokes, a man who would watch the news and yell at the television ("it's Dad's time to yell at the TV"), and a man who was deeply hurt by break-up of his marriage. There are plenty of stories about Serena's siblings and her mother as well. These stories are the best part of the book and I would love to read more of them, however Serena's musings on the 10 Secrets are also valuable in their own right, although if you have been a loyal follower of Wayne Dyer you will find that her words echo his pretty closely.

    My overall feeling about this book is that it is an honest account and that these indeed are Serena's own words...words coming from a daughter who truly loves her parents.

    Many more stories about Wayne have surfaced over the past two weeks from his other children, friends, and colleagues. Without exception they describe a man, a real man, who relentlessly strove to understand the real meaning of life and tried his best to live it and teach it to others. I think he was the real deal.

  • Lin Toms

    A writer too immature to write anything deep or of value. An attempt to sell a book using the fame of her father. She might be her father's daughter, but she's not her father's writer. Very disappointed.

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